Snoman

I have problems, I will admit... I'll say it. I am addicted to SNOWMEN! So much so that around three weeks ago I came across a 5' one in Home Depot and I wanted it but I can't afford it. Well, it's been under my skin and every time I go to work I pass the damn home depot. Well, yesterday I gave in to my addiction and promptly purchased the giant snowman. All is well with the world... or so I thought. I get the box out to my car only to realize after many attempts that the box simply isn't going to fit in my car. Yes, my trunk folds down in to my back seat... still, no good. So I sadly turned the cart around to return it. I stood in line patiently (you know I'm so patient!) waiting for this person to return what seemed like six hundred wall electrical plugs ONE AT A TIME mind you... Patient... patient... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHH... I promptly turned in to Charlene and marched out of the line and took the giant box back to my car. In full Charlene mode now, I open the giant box and remove the giant snowman and TA-DA! It fits.. I'm so happy now! I happily drive down the road with my enormous snowman. I get home. Open the trunk, pull out the snowman. As I'm doing so, a car pulls by and almost drives off the road. I assume he thinks I'm pulling a corpse out of my car? It was hilarious. So I get (I've named him Sam) Sam into my house and stand him up by the dresser behind the front door. Holy ****! This thing is GINORMOUS! It didn't seem so big in the home depot... why is it so big now? Oh well, it's done. I'm keeping Sam. The night progresses. Sam has now become my nemesis. Out of every corner of my eye appears "something"... suddenly I'm hearing "bumps in the night".... this thing is so huge that it creeped me out because I keep thinking I'm seeing somebody in my living room... AAAGH... C-R-A-Z-Y! yes... that's me...